Doing What You Love.

During the Chronic Pain Self Management Program at Constance Lethbridge we would talk about 'budgeting your energy'. When you make a budget for your money you make a plan to manage where your money will go. You see what are your expenses are, how much money you have coming in and plan accordingly. Budgeting your energy is the same concept. You take stock of the energy you have on any given day and set aside time and space for activities that bring pleasure and meaning to your life. This is important since if you only fill up your life with the things that you have to do you miss on the things that you want to do and that bring you joy.

The occupational therapists at Constance Lethbridge would talk to us about evaluating our priorities because we all have responsibilities in life. Responsibilities can be divided into two main categories: Important and Not Important. Within the 'Important' category you can either do it now or schedule it for later. Things within the Do It Now category require clear deadlines and consequences for not dealing with them promptly. These things are considered urgent. Other important things aren't urgent and can be Scheduled For Later. Then under the 'Not Important' category you can choose to Delegate something if let's say it doesn't require your specific expertise or Delete it entirely; these are usually distractions, for example spending lots of time aimlessly scrolling on social media. By deciding what's important in the now, what can wait a bit, what can be handed off to a spouse or coworker and finally what can be deleted, you can now make time for the things that you enjoy! Analyzing your activities and prioritizing what's truly important can be the key to finding balance in your life. Balance is key.

The cool thing about deciding what activities to make time for is there is almost no limit to what you can do! The possibilities are endless as each person's interests are unique! For instance my favourite thing to do is walk. I do it for exercise, for stress relief and to have time alone with my husband. Sometimes I get overwhelmed with my to-do list and I have to stop and remind myself that this is what is important to me; for my body, my mind and my relationship. I have a friend who has fibromyalgia and loves to play Lego! She finds that when she's concentrated on building Lego she doesn't feel the pain! My husband is a gym rat. He uses it to blow off steam and to keep his strength up for his physically demanding job. My son spends hours learning guitar. He searches up YouTube videos and diligently practices the chords to his favourite songs. Other activities can include knitting, biking, writing, drawing, cooking or playing computer/video games. 'Me time' can also be setting aside time for religious meditation to focus on your spirituality. It can include reading a good book or touching up on a new skill like painting. It can be as simple as sitting down with a cup of tea and making a phone call to a loved one to see how they're doing. Try different activities if you're not sure what you enjoy. Allow yourself to decide that a certain thing may not be of interest to you anymore even though it was at one time. Be open to new experiences and you will find that special something.

It may be difficult to set time aside at the beginning. It can feel foreign, selfish or even like you're wasting time and could be doing something more 'productive'. Breathe. Start with setting some boundaries about the time and energy you give to other people. It's not selfish to restrict your time a little so you can include me-time too. Instead of going from nothing to everything start by setting attainable goals like going for a fifteen minute walk or setting a timer for twenty minutes to read your favourite book. I promise you with time it will feel more natural and you'll learn to love and appreciate this form of self-care.

Remember that self-care plays an important role in allowing you to be there for others too. The analogy of putting on your oxygen mask on a plane before attaching those around you is a good one. Instinctively it may seem selfish to take care of yourself first but you can't take care of others if you've burned out. Make time for you.